I’m remembering a conversation with Papa Rolland and Mel Tari last August. A group of alumni, mostly women, had gathered for lunch at Chili’s in Pismo Beach, California. As we were leaving, my best friend and I found ourselves in a conversation with Rolland and Mel about the men in our generation and the often destructive relationships between males and females.
I am reminded of this conversation, (which I will focus more on it a bit), because of what I call the sister epidemic.
The word sister has found its way into the handy toolbox of men who wish to convey they are not interested in a woman, but wish not to speak the words “I am not interested in you.”
For most women, this does not convey The simple message that the man wishes. For that simple message to be the one conveyed, men would need simply to say that.
Now, I will not deny that I am spoiled. I come from a community of brothers who are passionately seeking to honor the women around them and see those women walk in the fullness of their callings and passions. These men, such as the famous Lewin men, carry a tool in their belt that many can learn from.
There is something entirely beautiful about a heart that is willing to communicate no matter the sting. There is a quiet confidence that can be respected, and a clarity that allows for healthy co-ed relationships.
So where does this lack of communication come from? This brings me back to the famous conversation.
Papa Rolland said it very simply. “There is an insecurity in the men of your generation that can only be addressed by loving and God fearing fathers.”
So, just how does this relate to the sister epidemic?
When men are not confident in their identity as Sons of God and the authority that comes from that place, they will not walk in boldness.
True confidence expresses itself in love, and therefore is easily received. Boldness that is from the Lord is gentle and kind, and does not fear. This confidence stresses faith in one’s self without the presence of arrogance or conceit.
Everything brought to light becomes light, right? So why not bring our intentions to the light, and let them shine.